Had difficulty sleeping last night. As is typically the case with insomnia, there is much on my mind. Strange occurrences that the mind simply can not understand logically or rationally, yet it loves to try. Perhaps if I write about it, that will help bring me clarity.
As dawn approaches and the morning sun turns darkness into light, I can not help but wonder what it all means. Discernment is truly an art beyond the mind’s capacity. For so long I was certain that the woman I was guided to was my “Twin Flame”. I had all the signs. A premonition of her eye color, hair color, skin color, etc. I recognized her in my soul as soon as I saw her. There was love at first sight, a deep love that lead a long period of heart break, healing, growth, expansion and profound lessons. Not to mentions the weird energetic experiences, kundalini as the old ones describe it, the dreams of her, the repeating numbers, etc.
I suppose that is the problem with labels. They limit us into thinking we have all the answers when we do not. It is only when we let go and things change does the “twin flame” become a “karmic soulmate” or “false Twin”. Ultimately, the labels do no matter. There are only lessons, healing and growth. There is only self-love and preparation for our true beloved.
I finally let her go. Perhaps it was long overdue. She made it clear to me that she simply did not share my feelings. This information no longer caused me heartache as it once did. I no longer needed to compare our experiences and cling to the similarities. The changes she went through when I arrived in her reality. I no longer had to chalk this up to a continuation of the “Runner and Chaser” energy. Just pure acceptance.
Strangely, a new woman has entered my reality in a sense. She has the same eye color, hair color and skin color. She is beautiful. She lives in the same country as the one I once considered my “Twin”. The country I have been receiving guidance to move to. The country I am planning on visiting soon and relocating to in divine timing. Most importantly, she is interested in meeting. She is willing to show up. She sees the beauty in me as I do her. She is not indecisive.
Is this a test of faith? Is this simply something I needed to help me let go? To move me into a new awareness? A new energy? Is she a potential soulmate? Am the catalyst for her? Perhaps she is none of these things and all.
The curse of an analytical mind on the spiritual path. What is known is this. I am no longer seeking and I am open to love. There are no coincidences and we meet no one by accident. There is a lesson and higher perspective with every encounter. There is no right or wrong, only alignment. None of it makes a difference in this present moment. I am here and they are there, half a world away.
There is never a lack of weirdness when following your path. The fact both of these women have such similarities in terms of rare features is uncanny to me. All that matters is this undeniable fact. Our guidance, to places and people, is ultimately leading to us to our greatest life experience. Wherever we are and whoever with, is where we are meant to be at that time. In the end, we end up in the place and with the one we are meant to. There is solace and peace in this. Now I can rest, with the knowing that all will work out for the good of all involved.
Dan McGinley RN BSN
Holistic Health and Consciousness Coaching