You maybe wondering what is Disenfranchised Penis Syndrome or DPS and how do I know if I suffer from it? The easiest way to summarize DPS is to compare to its sister syndrome, “Small Man” or “Napoleon”. Commonly witnessed among men who’s smaller than average stature, or rather the perceived inadequacy surrounding his size leads to a variety of behaviors to compensate. Behaviors can vary from spending excessive hours in the gym, compulsive seeking and obtaining of material objects ie clothing and cars, and most commonly observed is an overly aggressive demeanor towards other men whom are perceived as a threat. Hence the term Napoleon.
DPS is similar but specific to male sexuality. The victims and I use this term loosely will project their real or imagined sexual inadequacies towards their female counterparts (or male in homosexual encounters) in an aggressive, superior, and or domineering manner. Originally the intention was to coin this disorder “small penis syndrome”. However, following careful consideration I realized that this would only further fuel the inadequacies of the victim and therefore be counterproductive. Furthermore, the size of the penis in question is irrelevant. A well endowed man can still suffer from DPS. Whether a correlation between penis size and the severity of DPS exists has yet to be investigated. However, I suspect the smaller the penis the increased risk for suffering from DPS.
What causes DPS and how do I know if I suffer from it? DPS is caused by a variety societal, cultural and individual factors. The belief that Men are superior to their female counterparts. The belief Men and Women are vastly different ie men are unemotional and women are too emotional among many others. The belief Women are meant to be subservient to men in all manners. The expectation that women are to give themselves to men; physically, mentally and emotionally with little investment from their male counterpart. The problem being that it is simply expected and not earned. These beliefs are further reinforced when women allow or assume these roles. In other words, the belief is reinforced when women play ball. When they do not value themselves enough to say no. When they do not demand more for themselves and from their counterpart. So, can women blame men for playing their part?
This is not a Men vs Women argument and the truth is neither party is at fault. Through varies forms of media and indoctrination ie pornography, television, movies, etc. Men have been conditioned to view women as dispensable objects rather than meaningful pursuits. Women have been conditioned to view men as necessities rather than treasures. This is done to both parties from childhood and reinforced throughout our lives. We are separated as children. We are told not play together any longer. We are given different toys, different forms of physical expression, different occupations. We are told sex is the primary factor in our interactions and relationships. We are shown that sex without intimacy and connection is completely normal and expected. That it must be sought regularly in order to maintain a state of “normalcy”. We are taught that true love is dead. True love is not dead but it is dying. This becomes obvious when one observes Marriage. The increasing divorce rates and the fact most relationships that survive do so on co-dependency alone.
A few key symptoms of DPS. Do you view your female counterpart as less than your equal? Do you use pet names such as “baby”, “Sweetie”, “Momma” etc., outside of the context of an intimate relationship or mutual term of endearment? Do you often use sexual innuendos without regard of their reciprocity? Do you feel the need to obtain intercourse regularly, often from multiple partners? Are you offended by this article?
If you answered yes to any of these questions you may be suffering DPS. You are not alone and help is available. I was once what some would describe as a “womanizer”. Guilty of many of the behaviors I now describe. It wasn’t until I began to honestly examine my behavior, my desires, my thoughts, my beliefs and my emotions did I learn the truth. A truth reflected back to me from a female counterpart. As she describes herself a former “raging feminist”. This what a former Womanizer and Feminist can teach one other if they are willing to examine and take responsibility for their role in their own disempowerment, opposed to blaming and fighting one another. We can continue to make war or we can make love. Let’s choose love.
Dan McGinley RN BSN
Holistic Health and Consciousness Coach