For some time now I have been getting signs and urges to prepare for a big change. Specifically to take my Son out of Kindergarten and home school him. I have always wanted to do this. Have the flexibility to do what we like and avoid the standardized indoctrination of the public school system. I thought I had more time, considering not much has changed for me in the physical reality. I took him to School this morning despite the warnings to withdraw him. God forced the lesson on me through a series of events.
After dropping him off, I was feeling spontaneous. I drove east to a mountain range a few miles form his school. Figured I would get some needed grounding in Nature. Thirty minutes later I returned to my car to find it wouldn’t start and my phone battery is dead. Alone on a Mountain, I grabbed my things and began walking. I sense this is the last time I will see that car and said goodbye with gratitude. She is pretty beat up and frankly, I don’t mind parting with her permanently. I had hoped to give her to someone or donate her but I suppose she will be sold at an auction or scrapped.
Arriving at the base of the Mountain, a mini-van pulls up. It’s an elderly Woman who offers me a ride. I graciously accept. She begins to tell me she is on her way to the visit her Husband in the Hospital. He is dying of bladder cancer. This immediately changes my mood. It humbles me and reminds me of the bigger picture. I realize that my car problems aren’t shit. I support her to the best of my ability and she drops me off at my Son’s school.
I arrive early and wait. The Principal approaches me and begins discussing his absenteeism. I mention in other Blogs the difficulty I have had getting him to school due to the insomnia/ fatigue of from My Awakening. I stop her mid sentence and offer to withdraw him from school.
My only option was to walk home with / carry him. It is approximately 5-6 miles conservatively. I remember thinking how much this is going to suck. I thought/ prayed “Please bring me some help God”. Immediately afterwards a truck pulled up and a Gentleman offered us a ride.
Whether I manifested these events through my thoughts of withdrawing him from Kindergarten or my dislike form my (previous) car matters not. What matters is I sensed theses things leaving me before they did. I admit I was a little pissed when my car wouldn’t start and when the Principal approached me. I wanted to yell “You have no idea how hard Awakening is!?” However, I simply breathed and realized this is part of the plan. It makes me realize how far along I have come. My old-ego self would have been in a panic at this time. I would have been terrified to as vulnerable as I presently am. Frankly, I don’t give a shit about any of it. It is not apathy but Faith. Trust in my inner knowing and in God. Excitement for the changes to come. Gratitude for the kindness showed to me by complete strangers.
Love and Empathy,
I am Dan McGinley