Hey friends! I want to start by telling you all how much I appreciate your support, likes, re-posts and heart felt comments! The seemingly smallest of kindness are sometimes the most meaningful. So Thank You Again!
There is a difference between dreaming and living, saying and doing. I have been guided for sometime now to write a book. I felt so long that I needed to help people in a particular way and now see that was the result of deep rooted self-limiting beliefs. Needless to say I am crushing those each day as many of us are. I literally just started and this is a rough introductory chapter. It is essentially an autobiography about the last six months of my life and all the crazy amazing things I have been through. Let me know what you think? Feel free to comment and most importantly. Would you buy/ read it based on this? Does it ignite your interest?
Chapter One: (Title Pending)
My name is Dan McGinley. I am 33 years old. I am Registered Nurse and I hate my Job. I have been a RN for eight years. I have worked in multiple settings. ER, ICU, Pediatrics and Adults. In fact, I have worked in some healthcare position or another since my High School days. Currently I am working as Diagnostic Nurse at a local Hospital. What the hell is that you ask? Good question. It is essentially a Radiology Nurse. I sedate Adults and Children getting exams and procedures in the Radiology department. Furthermore, I am a go for with anesthesiology and a recovery Nurse for those requiring more than sedation. Not sure of the difference and care? To put it simply, sedation allows the Patient to maintain their own airway, breathe independently and respond to some degree of stimuli. Whereas General Anesthesia does not. Therefore Patients require advanced airways and possible rescue drug titration. Hence, a highly trained MD is required. It is a fine line at times and I have blurred it more than once.
Sounds like a kick ass job I know. I once agreed with that statement yet lately, I dread going to work like the fucking plague. It’s not the patients or work load. I quite enjoy the actual work and caring for my patients, especially my pediatric ones. I also get to teach. I love teaching new hires and nursing students what I can. I am knowledgeable about the parameters of my work among other things. I believe knowledge should be shared freely and openly. The same notion that drove me to write this book. Another reason is this. There is a saying that Nurse’s eat their young. This is often true and I recall being a Nursing student and treated like a leper. Some environments are worse than others. For example, when I transferred to the ICU, the assumption was that I was an idiot. Many Nurses in the ICU would cling to their knowledge tighter than their paycheck. This is wrong for many reasons yet I understand their perspective. Like many people they feared change. A new face threatens their perceived prowess and they falsely attribute their self-worth to their position. If there was one thing my ego-self hated, it was being treated like an idiot. Underestimating my intelligence was a sure way to incite my fury. I suppose it was this treatment that made me different. I saw my students not as they were but as they could be. I empowered their strengths while nurturing their weaknesses to the best of my ability. Finally, I made them (attempted to anyway) feel confident and supported. After all, they were often the only thing standing between the life and death of your loved one in a complication. Therefore, I saw their competence as a reflection on me personally.
So why the disdain? Two reasons really. Them and me. The supervisors and administrators drove me fucking bonkers. We simply had different values when it came to patient care. I believed in safety, they believed in the status quo. I believed in knowledge and they Titles. I believed in fairness and they themselves. Needless to say I had hard time dealing the many supervisors and administrators. I would make a decision as a patient advocate and have to defend myself for it later. I was verbal too. I wrote, what I felt were eloquent professional emails describing the problems that I and my fellow RN colleagues observed daily. I even went so far as to provide possible solutions and invite dialogue from the opposing perspective. Needless to say they were not well received. The truth is I threatened some egos and we all know how that turns out. I was labeled as arrogant and perhaps I was slightly. I was “coached” for speaking my mind in the best interest of Patients. I certainly wasn’t gaining anything by speaking up, other than my integrity. This was not the only reason for my eventual decision to go Rogue. You could say I always had a problem with authority. To be clear, not a problem with leadership but authority. There is a massive difference. You show me a true leader and I will quietly follow them into the abyss. As I am by writing this. These were not the people I was expected to follow. We can all relate to this, from corrupt Politicians to inept Supervisors, we are often asked to idly observe as they abuse their power. I could write an entire book on this with personal examples, but I don’t feel that is necessary. We all know what I am talking about. I suppose I got so sick of being abused by people I felt were less knowledgeable and altruistic than I was. I am no saint but good God I was more of a leader than most of them. I had just not had the courage or confidence to admit it previously.
The System, when I was in Nursing School and training. I was believer in modern Western Medicine to the core. I see now I was indoctrinated. I am not here to bash the healthcare system, big pharma or the FDA in its corruption. I see the value in medication, surgery and the amazing life saying systems in place. The problem is that it does not apply well to chronic lifestyle based diseases. Again, I could write a book with examples of this but its unnecessary. Just look at the statistics and better yet, spend a week shadowing any ER Nurse in America and the problem becomes clear. Pumping sick people with medication and only that, is not treatment or healing. It is prolonging suffering. The truth is this. The system is dependent on the keeping you chronically ill and makes little to no effort in changing this. This is why Physicians and Nurses are not trained in proven alternatives and behavior modification. This is why insurance rarely pays for such things and big Pharma? Well they simply are making way too much money to advocate for true health. Shit, not even the Dieticians educate patients about quality Nutrition.
If you haven’t guessed I love health and began self-study of the course of many years. I did this for my own healing and knowledge and never thought I would be sharing it with others. I simply gained alternative knowledge and applied it to my own health. I learned about the power of nutrition as medicine. The importance of exercise, meditation, belief augmentation and so forth. The potential of the Human Body to cure itself of the majority of disease processes with the appropriate consistent behaviors. There are many ways to prevent and cure most if not all chronic disease through lifestyle behavior. Most Healthcare professionals acknowledge this. The problem is the collective belief that patients won’t make changes. They believe you are too lazy and or stupid to save yourselves with the right education, resources and support. Perhaps I am an idealist, but I disagree. If I can overcome, addiction, depression, and so much more through self-knowledge and application than so can others. It goes back to how I view my Students. Not as a Man or Woman is, but how they can be.
You could say I lost my faith in the System. It wasn’t allowed or acceptable to share my knowledge with Patients. In fact, it was illegal. Not all Patients wanted to hear it, but some did. Some desperately craved knowledge and resources that I possessed. Yet, I couldn’t say a fucking word. Information changes situation and for some, it could have changed their lives. To be clear, I am not referring to losing a few pounds and decreasing risk of diabetes as a result. I am talking about teaching people ways to cure and prevent diseases that result in years of suffering and Death. Not another fucking gimmick or a quick fix. I am talking about true freedom from suffering and pain. I struggled to remain part of it. I suppose it is the classic moral dilemma. If you stand by and allow Evil to occur are you not responsible for it.
Love and Empathy