This morning I woke up in a rage. I was so sick and tired of this process that I simply lost my shit. I had been triggered by someone I love deeply and I now suspect that I did the same to her. Trigger is an internal emotional response caused by an external event or behavior. If we allow others to determine our reactions/ emotion then we surrender our power to them. We tend to externalize our emotions to deny the painful reasons they occur. We blame them, him or her for the way we feel. We must learn to own our emotions and in doing so we discover insights into our deeper Selves. Despite the many Paths to God and the unique journey we traverse. There remains universal symptoms, stages and cycles we all experience. This is the nature of the beast and until we are born into a Spiritually Aware reality then I’m afraid it is inevitable. Many refer to this particular stage or experience as the Depression and or loneliness state or cycle. Ultimately, in theory anyway, the duration of this stage/ experience is dependent on the individual and their ability to recognize and overcome certain false beliefs and emotions. The concept of separation, difference and the illusion of needing external love/ acceptance. In my opinion there is one main reasons that the Awakened become reclusive and retreat into hiding/ isolation.
We need to. The need to heal and transform. One simply can not remain in the same life circumstances, relationships and or patterns of coping and expect to transgress the fears, programs and conditioned patterns of self-destruction without escaping it. Either choose to leave or allow the Universe/ God to force the issue. Being alone allows us to reflect, rest, heal and transmute. Like a wounded Animal we prefer solitude over ridicule and persecution. We can spend days, weeks, or months in meditation/ introspection as needed. If we are in a situation with others (in an opposing vibrational state) then continuous triggering is the result. Being triggered is not “bad” but a matter of perspective. With the appropriate mindset, which is to discover why? Why are you reacting in such a manner? What is the underlying cause/ reason and what new belief is required to eliminate it? Eventually we can learn to interact with “regular” folks and will discover others we can better identify with. Remember the goal is not separatism but understanding, love, acceptance and forgiveness. So why do so many of us feel like the World, our Family and friend have abandoned us. This is both real and imagined (you are learning there is no difference) so you may be projecting your fear of being alone/ different on others. The other truth is that yes, you are now repulsive to certain people. When you begin speaking out about radical, unorthodox concepts and ideas the majority will shun away from you. This is true of all pioneers and thought provokers. When you peruse drastic change then you will meet an opposing force. “If you have enemies? good, It means you stood up for something in your life.” Winston Churchill. Many in the “Spiritual” community prescribe to the notion of vibration and resonance. Certain people in a “lower” or opposing vibrational state will simply not dig your energy and avoid you like Mother effing plague.
Whatever you decide to believe it makes no difference as the solution is the same. First you must embrace the isolation and go through whatever healing and learning that God requires of you. When you are stable enough and ready then return to the world as an example of love, kindness and light. If they hate you for it then forgive them for they know not what they do. Release the old with love and gratitude and embrace the new. The haters imparted valuable lessons on you and their is a correlation to the number of haters you have to the level influence and the steward of change you will become. Remember that you were given an immense blessing. Those who reject you do so in fear of what you represent. They cling to “The Matrix” and only they can fix themselves. A Shepard does not concern himself with opinions of sheep. I say this with the understanding that I too was once a sheep and we all have the capacity to become the Shepard. Those who love you and desire to be in your life will stand by you even if you are freak. Do not concern yourself with those who do not love you. The sad irony is they likely don’t love themselves. Remember the ultimate goal is to show them love and compassion. The isolation/ loneliness is the process in which we learn self-love and reliance. You are never alone despite your current perception.
Love and Empathy
Dan McGinley RN BSN