I recently made a video on this topic attached below. I decided to briefly write about it as well. I have always considered myself a better writer than a speaker but feel its important to provide both platforms as some of us are auditory vs visual learners. Furthermore I find less people read these days and it is good to see the non-verbal components of communication especially when the subject matter is abstract or difficult to believe and or understand. Keep in mind I am not scripted, Raw and Uncut, authentic.
There seems to be a myth developing among the spiritual community. That the Awakening process induces celibacy among men and possibly women. That is not true but it is relatively accurate. I can only speak from my experience and have only found a couple of other men who speak of this openly on youtube. I am not going to speculate on the feminine reactions/ changes in sexuality but I speculate their similarities in term of the way the view themselves and others. As this is universal among the Awakened. So what are we taking about? What changes and Why?
In terms of physiology nothing changes per se. Men should have no difficulty with erection and ejaculation. The hardware is the same but the software has undergone a massive upgrade. Orgasms are noticeably different. It’s not subtle. Men in general have a pretty standard orgasm. There is a small range of intensity that can vary but not much. I was no different until I Awoke. My orgasms now are exponentially better than they were in the past. They are the same on a basic level but the sensation I now experience is much more profound. I suspect this is a result of Kundalini energy. The Snake has awakened sort of speak. If you are the fortunate few who have had the honor of witnessing a female orgasm first hand (yes they are sometimes real). The one in which the woman trembles and convulses. That is the best descriptor I can give. Your knees get weak and you shake. I have felt a rush of energy shoot up my spine to my crown (head) during these times and this combined with a video from the Infinite Waters dude leads me to attribute it to Kundalini.
You require less Orgasms. You no longer feel the need to masturbate and seek sex in the traditional sense. This is where it gets complicated because the reasons are unique to the individual. Sexuality is unique to you. You aren’t simply hetero, Gay, Bi or whatever. We love to label and categorize things and people because it makes us feel as if we understand it and therefore control it. It is an illusion to minimize the illusion of fear. I am still Hetero. Your orientation does not change or at least mine has not. In order to understand the changes we must first recognize your current sexuality. We are sexualized very young. We are expected to conform to the standard. For heterosexual men this means being dominant, being the Alpha, having the “biggest Dick” in the jungle. It is changing on a level as women become more influential and powerful in our society. It is only partially changing and as boys become men they are told through media (music, television, etc) that their value as men is determined in part by their ability to suppress emotion/ be impervious to it and Fuck as many women as they choose. To have the control and power over women in sexual context. Now this is not simply a matter of who get to be on top during sex. It is the idea that the “greatest” of men are “true playas, ballas, and pimps”. This comes in many forms. James Bond being able to illicit the Love and cooperation the finest of women and yet retaining the emotional stoicism to leave her without hesitation or regret. Essentially using her for his own needs and she is rewarded with the greatest sex of her life. Then of course you have just about every hip hop video ever made where “Bandz is making em Dance and all these cheeks clapping, they aint using handz” (I am still a huge Juicy J fan). In terms of relationships it translates to a need for “your” woman to be loyal to you over all else. It’s not enough to be monogamous. It’s expected that desires, beliefs, life goals, behaviors, thoughts and words be approved by the man’s ego to be permitted. If not the result is insecurity and we all know how insecurities manifest. If publically asked we deny this because we do not see it. To see it is to see your ego self and all of your darkness.
How this manifested for me. The things that once aroused me changed drastically. I stopped liking / watching Porn. It is very common for men to watch porn and masturbate to it. It is the Elephant that shame blinds us to. There is a reason that pornography is no longer the long film productions with elaborate themes that they were in the 70’s. There is a title like Busty Mom Fucks Son’s Best Friend and that all the premise we want or require. The fetish/ genres have expanded drastically and this is not simply due to technology but rather, it reflects directly to the increased demand for violent, control and fear based sex. Bondage, abuse, rape, gang bang, forced facial are all manifestations in the growing insecurities among the Collective Masculine Identity. Consider it this way. You were told subconsciously that you were gong to be in control and get to choose which woman/ women you wanted and she was going to worship you. That she lives by your leave and you come first always. Maybe you are the poor bastard that doesn’t meet the standard for the majority of women. The one that most women ignore and disregard or maybe your first love ripped your heart from you chest when she gave her love (your love) to another. Now you are hurt and like a well trained man your grief is rapidly turned to rage. You are fucking pissed. You can’t acknowledge your pain, your vulnerability, your natural feminine energy because that shit is for pussies and bitches. It’s unacceptable to allow a women to get the best of you so you tell yourself it’s her, it women in general. They are all hoes and sluts. You can’t make a hoe a house wife right? There are no more ladies left and the only option is to Fuck em and chuck em. These suppressed emotions, insecurities, beliefs and fears are reinforced when we see images of a petite young girl getting F’d in the A by a muscular dude with a massive dong. Who pulls her hair back, slaps her a little bit and maybe spits in her face on occasion. Meanwhile she is “loving” it because that what all women like. If you can’t tell from the horrible acting that only really disturbed women “enjoy” such treatment then watch how women are “finger banged” in a standard (not amateur) porno. The fast aggressive linear motion. Believe me when I tell you NO woman likes to be touched this way. The female anatomy alone reinforces this statement. The G-spot (yes it is real and palpable to skilled hand) is not place on the anterior aspect of the vaginal canal by random accident. To be clear I am not adopting a feminist view point and saying Men are these horrible beasts and that Women are the victims. The truth is Women are equally fucked up in their own ways and we are all the victims of multiple systems of believes designed and intended to oppress us. Making this a matter of Men vs Women is not my intention as Separatism and blame will only confuse and alter the wisdom here. To summarize I got to a point where pornography in general has the opposite effect it’s intended for me and despite what you may think this is not the reason I rarely masturbate now.
I used be a relatively average guy. Probably slightly worse in terms of promiscuity and my cynicism regarding women and relationships. I had zero respect for romantic relationships. I saw them as complete failures and bullshit. I honestly felt that Human Beings simply were not meant to be monogamous. Marriage was a means of control imparted by the Church and that it was terrible decision for practical purposes. I also believed that as a Man I need sex periodically. If I didn’t Fuck a girl, preferably a “new” or different one then I would somehow loose something. I had what many men would consider a respectable methodology for getting laid. I developed a system to get her naked with minimal expenditures of time and resources. I felt that if I did have a new prospect I wasn’t thriving. If a girl’s “shelf-life” expired she was disregarded for she no longer served my ego needs. Shelf–life was determined by her ability to please me and not cause me difficulty. If she was in a relationship or even married it mattered not. This reinforced my belief that marriage was bullshit. In a more sinister sense I actually preferred when she was in a relationship as it fed my sexual masculine ego. I had no desire to learn more about who they were as people and if they wanted to lye and talk I would get irritated. When we Awaken we acknowledge that we are beyond our petty physical self serving desires. We see beyond the illusion and the ego. I now see women as not just people but as the spiritual beings they are. I no long qualify them. In terms of sexuality I still admire certain physical attributes but they are not the primary “prerequisite” and it is less important then who they truly are. The problem is there so few women who allow their authentic True-selves to be seen. They hide because they are programmed to falsely believe they will only be desired and loved if they meet an imposed standard. The opposite is true. Show me your soul and I will show you love without condition.
“There is nothing more beautiful, more sexy, more seductive then someone who is comfortable in their own skin.” Billy Alsbrooks
Spiritual growth is about introspection. Fearlessly examining you past traumas and pain, learning what you must, forgiving yourself and others, releasing the baggage. Whether you are Awakened or not we can all do this. The only difference is that your Awakening forces the issue. You feel it and you know, you desire to undergo this process because you now understand the love and insight that comes afterward. If you are thinking “well this guy hasn’t gone through what I have, my shit is so much worse”. True we are all unique but to assume I haven’t had my heart broken or been abused in past relationships then you are very wrong. The difference is I now see those experiences as they truly are. I learned what I had to and am better for it. I love all my ex girlfriends as I do all people but am especially grateful to them for the lessons imparted.
The objective result is that I rarely masterbate and have not had sex since this began. Approximately six months if you must know. I do choose this but not in the sense that implies depravation, self-discipline or vows. This is not Celibacy or asexuality. I am simply no longer controlled by my body. My mind is not the same as it once was. I do not require the stimulation to feel good in any way. I am not avoiding sex nor am I seeking it. I will have sex again when and how I choose and nothing influences or dictates this. This is self-mastery.
Thanks for reading! Comment below if you prefer the video or Blog. I apologize about the shitty sound quality. It will improve soon.
Love and Empathy